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Wanting something you've never had

It was the brainiac Albert Einstein who said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. And he would know, after his countless experiments formed the basis for him publishing more than 300 scientific papers and 150 non-scientific works !

But, back to the point … in the same vein, it follows that if you want something you’ve never had, then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done.

The problem is, though, that it’s often as if there are invisible hands that hold us back when we want to do something we’ve never done. And this is what I want to focus in on today. So what are examples of these invisible hands? Well here’s some of them:

1. CHANGE
None of us like change. We are creatures of habit. If you want things to change you’re going to have to get to a point where you embrace change. Pretty obvious isn’t it. But easier said than done. Enough said ! To do something you’ve never done will require embracing change.

2. FEAR
We all have fears, and they come in many shapes and sizes. And they can emanate from many areas and for many reasons. But their effects are the same – doubt, hopelessness, nervousness, and the desire to shrink back rather than move forward. For example – fear of failure. Unlike kids, as adults, we often visualise the outcome already don’t we. So why would we begin or try something new or do something we’ve never done when we might embarrass ourselves and make a fool of ourselves? We see what could happen in the negative, rather than what could happen in the positive. The challenge is not to let that fear or those fears be a controlling influence on us and to cause us to stop moving forward in the direction of our dreams. It’s a choice. Plain and simple.

That’s a key point I’ve definitely discovered in my journey through life so far and through the opportunity I’ve had to meet and interview some incredible people as I did for my book. It is clear to me that people who accomplish incredible things face the very same fears as you and I do. The difference – they choose to take a different approach and mindset. They choose to see the glass half full. They choose to see the potential and possible outcome. They choose to dare to dream and follow those dreams. They choose to think bigger and broader about what’s possible and to have a go regardless of the ultimate outcome. They choose to see possibilities and dreams and to ask, ‘Why not?’ rather than see things and ask, ‘Why?’ They choose to believe the reasons why they’ll achieve their dream, not the reasons why they won’t achieve it. They make a conscious choice.

It reminds me of something Australian Rugby League player, Jason Stevens, said to me when interviewing him.
“Before a game, I was pretty much always fearful – especially in a big game like State of Origin, where there are millions watching. You have the expectations of fans, and you don’t want to let anybody down. For me, the feeling of fear never really went away, but what I learnt was to do things afraid.”

3. LIMITING MINDSETS
To do something we’ve never done requires a mental shift doesn’t it? A change of paradigm. Adopting a new view. Having a change of attitude. This is where it starts as our mindset effects our actions which then effects the outcome.
But this is easier said than done isn’t it? The crazy thing though is that it is often our own self-limitations that hold us back the most as opposed to limitations ‘imposed’ on us by others. It’s as if we’re chained up by our own choice. I mean, there’s not one person in a hundred who couldn’t write down his or her most exciting dream and not at the same time tell you, ‘It’s probably impossible; it’ll never happen.’ There’s not one person in a hundred who couldn’t give you good reasons why his or her dreams won’t come to pass and why he or she won’t achieve what he or she would like to. This is not a new problem. But, if you want something you’ve never had ==>> then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done ==> to do this you need to deal with your self-imposed limitations and adopt a new attitude that will lead to new behaviour.

As athletes we deal with self-imposed limiting mindsets all the time. If we don’t, we’ll never break through that invisible barrier and set a new ‘personal best’. Or we’ll never beat that person we’ve never beaten. So here’s a few ways myself and others have used to help us adopt an attitude that will then help us act differently and lead to new results.

A) Visualise the positive outcome – When I’m going to the gym for a ‘testing’ session, do you think I go up to the squat rack, look at the 272.5 kg ‘personal best’ on the bar and think, I can’t lift that weight once, let alone twice or three times!? Or Wow, that looks heavy; I’ve never lifted that weight before!? Of course not! If I did, I’d never progress as an athlete. I’d never push the boundaries, improve, and move forward. Instead, during the days leading up to that testing session, then while I’m warming up, and also immediately before I put the weight on my shoulders, I close my eyes and imagine myself lifting that weight. I tell myself, You can do this. You love this. You’re strong and powerful, and this is light. This is only an extra 5 kilograms, or 2 per cent. This is easy. I do this over and over to ensure I shatter that limiting mindset and put the positive image / mindset front and centre.

B) Foster unlimited thinking – Australia’s famous Paralympian and World Sportsperson of the Year, Michael Milton (whom I feature in my book used to inspire himself to unlimited thinking in the following way … ‘I remember that with my goal-setting, I used to grab a tape measure and put a mark of 2 metres and 8 centimetres – 2.08 metres – on the wall, which is the world high-jump record for an athlete with one leg. If you can imagine a guy hopping up to a bar and then hopping over a 2 metre bar without touching it, for me that was something that always inspired me and reminded me, when setting my goals, to set the bar high so that I made sure my goal was challenging enough yet realistic.’

C) Becoming aware of your thoughts – Olympic Gold medallist Lydia Lassila describes how before she could change her thoughts she first needed to become consciously aware of all the limiting thoughts going through her brain. “If you think about even one hour in a day, there are so many thoughts going through your mind; lots of garbage and lots of thoughts that don’t serve you . . . Becoming consciously aware of all these thoughts going through your head allows you to then analyse your beliefs . . . to be able to change your thinking.”

CHALLENGE

Your outcome (something you’ve never had) ==>>
is determined by your actions (doing something you’ve never done) ==>>
and your actions are first influenced by your thoughts

So the statement at the top of this post is true, but it actually starts with your thoughts.
So my challenge is to think about the invisible hands (your thoughts) that might be first holding you back.
Thoughts around 1) Change 2) Fears 3) Limiting Mindsets

For more help and information read
A Life That Counts

To dare – the quest of Mt Midoriyama

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYcxmJP27dc

Ninja Warrior is a reality-based television show where competitors from across the country attempt to successfully navigate extremely difficult obstacle courses as they progress through the competition. If competitors successfully pass the initial trial stages, they receive the right to attempt what is regarded as the most difficult obstacle course in the world, held at Mt. Midoriyama. Ninja Warrior is divided up into four stages each of which has several challenging obstacles. Every year, or occasionally every season, Mt. Midoriyama opens its gates to allow 100 athletes to try to take on its obstacle courses. Over 14 years and through twenty seven tournaments, only three individuals have ever succeeded. All other 2,697 Ninja Warrior attempts were met with bitter defeat. It’s an unforgiving competition, where one slip of the foot, or one mistimed jump or one mistake can de-rail and eliminate you. All of the hard work contestants have put in, all of the dreams they might have had … can be gone in a second.

Now I’m with you – the show’s name and the quest to become a ‘Ninja Warrior’ – well, it probably makes you roll your eyes doesn’t it !! But take a look at the calibre of athletes attempting this. Many of these athletes train all year long on self-designed obstacle courses just for the mere possibility of getting the chance to attempt Mt. Midoriyama. They invest their time, make sacrifices, and risk injury in the hopes of accomplishing what so few have successfully done.

While only three out of thousands have reached the pinnacle of success in this sport, there have likely been thousands more that failed to even make the attempt because of fear of failure or fear of embarrassment. When they fail at Ninja Warrior it is seldom gracefully … and it’s on national television !

To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily. To not dare is to lose oneself. (Soren Kierkegaard)

But take the TV cameras away and isn’t it the same thing ? … many of us would rather not attempt the obstacle course because of the high likelihood of not succeeding than have a go. And this is the point … many of us don’t dare to have a go because we want to know that we’ll be successful and achieve that goal before we even start. But that isn’t the way life works or achieving great things goes is it.

Ask anyone who has achieved anything great and they’ll tell you what the path looks like. It starts with a decision. A decision to believe and step-out even though you don’t know if you’ll achieve what you want. There are set-backs and there are disappointments along the way. It requires discipline and planning and strategy. It requires ignoring many people who find it easier to say/shout/proclaim from the sidelines that it can’t be done instead of having the guts to try it themselves. It takes developing a belief in yourself because you have to overcome not only the doubts of others, but you’re own doubts. It requires learning to ‘enjoy’ the process of the stretching and self-growth and the challenge that chasing that goal requires.

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly. (Robert Kennedy)

We all have our own Mt. Midoriyama we want to conquer. It could be a character trait or an event or an experience or some other sort of goal or vision we have for our lives. So here’s a few thoughts to challenge and help you conquer your own Mt. Midoriyama.

1) Be Willing to Take Risks. Most individuals are extremely risk adverse in their approach to life. Make no mistake, whether you are attempting to achieve financial success or sporting success or some other goal, you are going to have to leave your comfort zone. For example, you can’t become a successful trader by simply doing virtual trades your whole life. And you can’t become a good sailor by staying on the shore. At some point you are going to have to take a risk.

2) Doubt doubt. Do not be surprised. Unfortunately whenever you set off on your journey to achieve great things, you will not always have the support of friends, colleagues, and even family members. Do not be naive in this regard. Not everyone will embrace your journey. There will be doubters. It is easier to knock someone else down than to do it yourself. Be prepared to ignore this negativity and create a self-belief and a self-determination.

3) Be stubborn in a good way. Along your quest to conquer your Mt. Midoriyama, you will face the cold hard reality of how much you actually want it. And the answer will be very simple – you’ll either give up or you wont. You’ll either see something as an obstacle that will stop you or a barrier to your success that needs to be overcome (because you will achieve – when is the question). You see there are far too many books out there like ‘The Secret’ that espouse the ‘believe and you can achieve’ sort of philosophy. Belief is just one part of the journey. The other half is determination, hard-work, stubborness, perseverence, desire, discipline, training, willingness to critique and learn and so on. So count the cost before you start and know that when you face obstacles on your path to success, you will no doubt face the cold hard questions. What will be your answer?

Challenge
Let me leave you with one of my favourite quotes. Hopefully it is enough to get you moving and going after what you really want, or to overcome whatever it is that is holding you back.

You’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. (Wayne Gretzky)

A sign …

I hope you’re smiling and I hope you’re challenged !

Are you asking the right questions ?

You may have heard the expression “If you ask a good question, you’ll get a good answer”. Well, with that in mind, guest blogger Tim Birch once again offers some great advice, wisdom and challenge for us around this topic. Over to you Tim …

Questions can be a powerful motivator if asked in the right way, context and by the right person…namely you!

The ability to ask the right questions of yourself when faced with challenging situations or when you require extra motivation, help you add the necessary layers of confidence that you need to propel you closer to your goals and dreams. If you’re able to ask courageous questions that cause you to then take positive action it will further reinforce your ability to achieve your desired outcome.

For example, questions are great at interrupting your thinking pattern and get you to focus on what matters. They also help filter the information in your environment; what you take notice of and what you ignore. Asking the right questions can also dramatically change the meaning you give to any experience and can cause a change in perception; ‘What can I take away from experience that will help me grow into the person I want to be?’

Here are four types of questions you can use in your own life:

1. Questions that focus your mind on solutions and get us to consider options: ‘What are five ways to solve this?’ or ‘Who else has done this and what can I learn from them?’

2. Questions that get us to take action: ‘What must I do right now to get the result I want?’ or ‘What is the cost to me not taking action right now?’

3. Questions that get us to take responsibility: ‘What can I do about this situation to turn it around?’ or ‘Who can I speak to in order to achieve the desired action?’

4. Any question that changes how we feel about an experience: ‘How can I learn from this?’ or ‘How will this make me stronger?’

Challenge: Remember, the deeper your level of self-questioning, the greater depths of self-awareness you’ll have to convert into actions. So what questions will you ask of yourself today?

‘Some men see things and say, ‘Why?’ I dream of things that never were and say, ‘Why not?’
George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950).

ACKNOWLEGDEMENT: The context of this post was taken from an extremely well-written and powerful book, ‘How To Take Control Of Your Brain’, by George Lee Sye…well worth a read!

How bad do you want it ?

Today I have invited a good mate of mine Tim Birch to write the weekly blog. Tim is an inspirational guy and one of those good guys all-round. In many ways we’re cut out of the same stone and we often trade quotes or videos or thoughts. That was why, as expected, I knew he’d come up with something inspiring and challenging. Over to you Tim …

“How often does ‘life’ get in the way of our best laid plans and intentions? So often the things we know we want to achieve get pushed further and further away due to the circumstance we let limit us…

I say ‘let’ because there is always a choice. A choice to say ‘Yes, I’m getting up when the alarm sounds to take a step in achieving my dream’, or ‘Yes, I’ll spend my weekend focussing on my studies’. The alternatives to these two scenarios may be staying in the warm, cosy bed or heading out to see friends for dinner…but at what cost.

You need to make your goals and dreams mean something and often it is only when these things seem like they will be taken from us that we start to really fight for what we want.

The below clip illustrates that, “when you want to succeed, as bad as you want to breath, only then will you be able to succeed”.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aowB5wNPvWQ&feature=player_embedded

Don’t tell me how bad you want to succeed. Get up each day and show me. No one will remember you for what you planned to accomplish in life. You will only be remembered for what you actually did.

My challenge – What will you do today ?

Not all that glitters is gold !

Elite professional sports people are some of the most dedicated people on the planet. I know this from the inside as I’ve been a full-time athlete in two sports and spent half my life around elite sportspeople. High performers can be found in any area – from mucisians, to doctors, to florists, to teachers. But my experience is in sport.

These elite athletes place their bodies on the line and commit themselves 100% to their sport. They live, breathe, eat, drink, sleep it. They put the rest of their life on hold as they prioritise training and competing above all else. Most people look from afar and wish they could live that life – an exciting life of travel, fame, money, adulation, following your passion and getting paid for it, achievement and the pride of representing your country.

But here’s the thing … whilst I wouldn’t change it for the world, not all the glitters is gold.
Here’s a lesson I’ve learnt along the way:

Success. Highlights videos. Medal ceremonies. Smiling faces. Sponsored cars. Television interviews. Signing autographs. Entry to great parties and events. Travel. The cheers of the crowd. Fame and profile.
Good hey … wouldn’t you want that ? … Absolutely !

But how about this ? Getting up at 5:30am to train when you don’t feel like it. Constantly watching your diet. The pain of pushing yourself. Missing weddings, parties, BBQs to go to bed early or because you’re travelling. Rehab for injuries. The monotony of training, training and more training. Feeling sore. Competing in rain and snow and minus 18 degree temperatures. All the work to prepare the sleds and polish runners. Dealing with the disappointment of non-performance or non-selection after you’ve sacrificed so much.
Good hey … wouldn’t you want that ? … well most people couldn’t be bothered.

There is a saying that says “Everyone desires to be a champion, but only champions have the desire to prepare.”

And to me that speaks of hardwork, perseverence, and discipline. Talent is never enough. Greatness isn’t born. Highly successful people do not just ‘become’ successful – they earn it. There are no shortcuts to success or achieving anything worthwhile. The ‘Secret’ and wishing the ferrari into your drive doesn’t work. We want it to because we’d rather shy away from the hard work and take the easy path. That’s natural, but it isn’t the way of things. It is more glamorous on the outside than the inside.

Consider the perseverence of some of the greatest achievers like Hannibal, Walt Disney, Christopher Columbus, J.K. Rowling, Thomas Edison, Abraham Lincoln.

So my challenge to you is this … you want the ‘gold’ (whatever that is). But what are you prepared to do to get it? Because on the inside it is a very different story and experience !

Andy Irons – I lost to a girl in my first contest !

It was a sad week last week as we’ve saw the tragic death of Andy Irons and we mourn his loss and think of his wife and unborn baby left behind. Here is a video tribute to him.

But in everything that has been written and said and shown … one thing stood out like a beacon to me.

Andy Irons: “….I lost so many heats to get to where I was. I lost to a girl in my first contest ever. And I quit for a year and never touched a jersey. And I had to pick up the jersey after that and get back in there. And that’s the only reason I got to where I’m at, or I was at, five years ago when I won those titles. And, you know, I haven’t won the title in a long time, but you know I’m getting back in the jersey and I’m not winning heats yet, but I gotta start somewhere.”

That there is what makes a champion. That is another testament to the age old value of resilience. The people that win in life are not always the smartest, biggest, strongest, or most talented. The people who win have all these things in some measure but the traits that are the stepping stones to their success are also

Learning from their mistakes
Overcoming disappointment
Perseverence and resilience
Believing in themselves
Hard work and commitment

Never ever forget that. Be inspired by Andy Irons. Lest we forget

Could'a, Should'a, Would'a

I’m always surprised by the number of people who say they’ll do something and never do, who plan to do something and never do and who want to do something but never do. I call these people – could’a, should’a, would’a sort of people.

I never want to be a could’a, should’a, would’a sort of person because to me that spells regrets. That person spells never having the guts to have a go regardless of the outcome. That person spells dreams they haven’t followed. That person spells disappointment inside eating away at them because they never did something. That person spells talk is cheap. That person spells what they say is not what they do and so they’re word cannot be trusted. That person spells, when they make a decision they don’t keep it. That person spells, either they never start it or even if they do they start strong and finish weak.

This is a picture that I put up on my wall in the Olympic Village in Torino when I was competing at the Winter Olympics in 2006. It was my first Olympics and I was conscious that I didn’t want to just get there. I wanted to compete to the best of my ability and let my actions speak louder than my words. I equalled the Australian record in my first year as pilot. It is something I’m proud of. But I’m equally as proud of not being a could’a, should’a, would’a sort of person.

My challenge – the next decision you make – do it ! Talk is cheap.