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Fishing without knowing it is not fish you’re after

“Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after”
(Henry David Thoreau)

It’s a funny quote this isn’t it because it could be interpreted in a few ways. For me it makes me think of two things.

Firstly, the journey. In today’s society we are so goal focussed. And I’m certainly guilty of this – both as an individual and also as someone who writes on this and speaks on this a lot. But ‘guilty’ is not the right word because being purpose-driven and having a dream and chasing goals around this dream is not a bad thing at all. In fact it is a great thing. BUT, often we spend our whole lives chasing the goal (our whole lives fishing), without realising that it is not in the achievement, but in the activity itself that we find enjoyment, meaning and value. Is the contestant on The Biggest Loser proud of losing all that weight? Of course. But do they also look back and realise they are prouder of the person they’ve become through the journey that enabled them to lose that weight?! Is the Olympian proud of getting to the Olympics? Of course. But are they also proud of the journey and what it took to even qualify and get there?!

Secondly, perspective. When I wrote A Life That Counts and chose the title it was because I wanted to challenge us as to what it means to live a life that really matters and stands for something. I’m all for following my/your dreams and achieving my/your goals. I write about this and speak about this so often. But, they’re just part of the picture of life. They’re not the whole fabric. The purpose of life is far greater than our own personal fulfilment, our career and our own peace of mind. It is not measured solely by an Olympic medal, by a particular goal achieved, by how wealthy you are and what you earn, by how many twitter followers you have, or by public recognition and fame. After all, at our funeral and after we die, it’s not our achievements, our degrees, our bank balance or our fame that people will really remember and speak about. I write more about this in the last chapter of my book. What is it to live a life that counts?

Furthermore, happiness and fulfilment aren’t ‘out there’, they’re within. They’re independent of circumstance and they don’t rest solely on whether we achieve a specific goal. Succeeding in the game of life is bigger than all this. How often do we go running after things that we think will make us happy, only to realise that they don’t ultimately satisfy? The next car. The next job. The next girl or boy. The next drug. The next adventure or experience. We go fishing to catch one kind of fish and realise it doesn’t make us happy, so we try and catch another one. We spend our whole lives fishing without realising it’s not the fish that will make us happy. As a christian, it reminds me of the wise words of Jesus “What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world yet forfeits his soul. And what can a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matthew 16:26). For me, Jesus is the only one that could satisfy my heart and fill that God-shaped hole that I tried to fill with so many other things. He is the only one that could fill me with a peace which is unexplainable.

Many men go fishing their whole lives, without knowing it is not fish they’re after. Food for thought.

Are you happy ? … how to get happiness

Happiness. We all want to be happy don't we. It's on top of all of our lists when it comes to things we want in our life. And its the same for everyone – regardless of where you live in the world; no matter how rich or poor you are; no matter your background or your age – we all want to be happy.

The question then is how ? Some try and achieve it through money and wealth (buying happiness). Others through service and charity. Others through achievements. Others through meditation. Others through drugs and alcohol. Others through relationships and sex.

So what makes you happy ? Perhaps you remember a past blog I wrote on happiness where I shared some findings around happiness. Some of the key points I wrote about were:

Surprisingly, according to this research, genetics play a bigger role than we would have first thought in our happiness. And yet, life's circumstances (our wealth, material possessions, what happens to us) play a much smaller role than we would have first thought. It is why a Masai herdsman can be as happy as a multi-millionaire (see details here). Or why a lottery winner and a paraplegic can return to the same previous long-term happiness level (see this article and see here).
Most importantly, a big part of our happiness is determined by our intentional activity – what we think and what we do. And the good news is that this is in our control – so in this way happiness is a choice. So if we find and use strategies focussed on increasing our happiness (exercise gratitude, enjoy pleasurable activities, improve your stress management skills, manage and harness your thoughts, focussing on those things and those people that make you happy, make sure you are striving after the right goals for the right reasons etc) it can have a big effect.

So with that in mind, here's a couple of thoughts from my life experience so far as to things you can do that will contribute to being happier.

1. Realise that it's your life and that you (and noone else) is responsible for your happiness. This sounds so chiche, but it's true. You along know what makes you happy. You alone cultivate those things in your life. You alone do those activities, and surround yourself with those people, and think those thoughts, and make those decisions that contribute to your happiness. You alone create the happy life you dream of. You and not someone else.

2. Don't live your life by other people's expectations or to try to please everyone. Don't live to please others. And don't live by their expectations and their comments. You'll never please everyone anyway and it honestly doesn't really matter that they think anyway. Live your life by the beat of your own drum. Live your life how you want to and on your terms.

3. Quit worrying. What will worrying add to your life? It is time and energy invested in what you think and hope wont happen, and may not actually happen. Worrying achieves absolutely nothing. It isn't productive. It wastes precious time. It is destructive in many cases. And it puts your focus in the wrong direction. Learn to quit worrying and you'll be a whole lot happier.

4. You can't buy happiness. Never forget that the best things in life truly are free. Health. Love. Relationships. Satsfaction. Enjoyment. Purpose. Happiness. You can't buy these. We try and fill our life with things that give us 'momentary' pleasure. And in many respects these 'things' complicate our lives. Life is simpler than that. And happiness is simpler than that too – despite what the world tries to tell us.

My Challenge
What makes you happy ? Find out. Cultivate and embrace these things. Implement them in your life. And let your happiness be the judge and proof of if they make a difference.

We’re both scared but for different reasons

We’re both scared but for different reasons.
I’m scared of what I wont become.
You’re scared of what I could become.
I wont let myself end where I started.
I wont let myself finish where I began.
I know what’s is within me even if you can’t see it yet …
I will become what I know I am.

Fear holds so many of us back. And it comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes. It could be the fear of failure. Or it could be the fear of success. It could be the fear of letting others down. The fear of disappointing your parents or teacher. It could be many things.
But here’s something I’ve learnt it my own life and also when interviewing the 10 famous Australians for my book A Life That Counts. Successful people face the same fears as we do. It is not that they are not afraid. It is that they choose to ignore it. They choose to do something regardless of their fear. They choose to adopt a different mindset with that fear.

You see fearlessness is not the same as the absence of fear. The fearless person is well aware of the fear she faces. The fear, though, becomes a compass, not a barrier. It becomes a way to know what to do next, not something that has to be denied or an evil demon to be extinguished. When we deny our fear, we make it stronger. And trying to deny it doesn’t make us fearless.

But acknowledging your fear and moving on / choosing a new (brave) mindset permits any fear to exist without strengthening it or letting it control you.

“We’re both scared but for different reasons.
I’m scared of what I wont become.
You’re scared of what I could become.”

Challenge
The fear will not necessarily go away. So what new empowering and brave mindset will you adopt despite the fears you have ?

The irony of judement

There’s a funny story to when I learnt this. I had won some money whilst working at ANZ and was able to spend it on my own self-development. I could do whatever I wanted as long as it got signed off. Well, whilst some went off and started their masters, and others did some specific courses on offer … I went ice-climbing in NZ.

Well aside from that being a life experience (and a frightening one for that matter), I also did a whole host of personality profiles. I did one called the LSI (Lifestyles Inventory) and as part of this you get your family / friends/ boss / employees to fill out a comprehensive questionnaire on you. And then you do the same yourself. You then compare the two results and low and behold others see you differently to how you see yourself.

The life lesson learnt – you judge others by their actions but yourself by your intentions.

It is said that when you point the finger you have one finger pointing at someone else, but don’t forget you have 4 fingers still pointing back at you. And the Bible puts it like this “Get the log out of your own eye before you get the speck out of someone elses”.

Challenge
Before we judge others, we should first judge ourselves.
And if ever we do judge others we should never forget to judge ourselves by the same standards to avoid being hypocritical.
After all, we judge others by their actions but ourselves by our intentions.

Taking action – you can’t build a reputation on what you’re gonna do !

Frankly, talk is cheap

Following your dream

Controlling my wild mind and stopping the weeds from growing

It always amazes me how quickly our body and mind tend back to the old ways. It’s like a garden that you work hard on to get to look beautiful. You spend all that time and effort getting rid of the weeds and then the moment you leave it those damn weeds start to grow again and before long, if you leave it, you have a wild overgrown garden again.

For me that’s the same as my body and mind.

Over the years I have received lots of comments from people saying they wish they had half the will power, determination and dedication that I have. But when they say it, I know that that may be the case right then (say in the middle of training and preparing for the Olympics). But I know how easily I tend back to just like everyone else. Making excuses. Running through the list of why I should not do something – like “I’m too tired”, “I’ll just work extra hard tomorrow”, “I couldn’t be bothered”, “Eating this won’t effect me that much”, etc! The weeds grow back pretty quickly !!!

Excuses are a human tendency. That little voice is always there. And it will never go away. No matter what people say or perceive or the comments that I’ve had – I know we’re all the same. Your mind is a wild animal unless you learn to control your thoughts. The weeds will always grow. So unfortunately there is no easy fix. You need to choose to overrule these thoughts.

Your mind can take you as far as you want to go in life or you can decided to limit your existence and waste all of your potential. You choose. To transform yourself inside and out is painful. Straight up. But the pain of change is only temporary, where the pain of staying where you are, drowning in unhappiness, lasts a lifetime.

So here’s some thoughts on controlling your wild mind and not letting the weeds grow !

1. You need a dream or goal – If you do not have something in life that you are working towards, you’re dead! So find that dream. Find that thing you want to do. You may have forgotten about it or considered it impossible. I have proof that if you decide to go after something with everything you’ve got, envisioning success in every moment, regardless of what you see or feel in the natural – you can achieve anything! After all , what is an Aussie boy who lives at Manly doing competing in the snow and ice in bobsleigh in the Olympics. And hopefully there is lots of inspiration throughout this blog to get you moving along this path.

2. It always starts with a decision – In the moment that you have the opportunity to either decide to do something that brings you closer to your goal or to decide to make 10,000 excuses why you should avoid the choice that you know you should make, tell yourself to shut up and win that moment. As you increase the moments that you win as opposed to giving in, eventually you will wake up a different person.

3. Become aware of your thinking – become aware of the excuses running through your brain and the self-talk inside your head.

4. One brick at a time – Once you’re aware of your thinking you can practice overruling them. You can’t just snap your fingers and change your way of thinking, you need to start small and practice on little things. Day by day. Decision by decision. Building up your mental toughness one brick at a time. It’s like doing a little bit of gardening every day !

4. Some practical tips – Here’s some tips from a past blog on HOW to conquer that little voice

So good luck. I believe in you!

Rollo

Cool Runnings – the sequel …

Well I knew the day would come one day and I couldn’t bring myself to even say the word until recently, but I have decided to RETIRE. I’ve even let people know and sent an email to the Olympic Committee.

I eagerly watched the results during World Championships this week and one part of me yearned to be there, but if I truly look inside, I know I don’t have the hunger that it takes to do all the things you need to do and make the sacrifices you need to make … to keep going … and go for my 3rd Olympics.

I have peace about it. It has been a good ride. I travelled to places I never thought I’d go. I’ve met people I never thought I’d meet. I competed at two Olympic Games – something that I always dreamed of but never knew if it would be possible. I’ve learnt to love winter. To drive on German autobahns. To drive in the snow. To put snow chains on in a hurry. To dress in minus 25. To say hello in a number of different languages. To squat 272kgs and so on and so on. It’s been a good ride. Fulls of ups and downs. Full of frustration and politics and agendas. But full of satisfaction and pride and fulfillment.

So here are some photos that remind me of the good times. Goodbye bobsleigh. You will always have a place in my heart and I will definitely miss you !

Nike vs Adidas

There is nothing in particular to say this week … I just thought this was an awesome and clever ad. Enjoy !